I find photography in all social contexts, to be the most uncomfortable experience I can think of. The phrase (or word) ‘smile’ is one of the most astonishing parts of the entire ordeal. If you were genuinely happy, there would be no reason to utter the word before taking the picture, so therefore society is asking you to lie about the fact that you are having a rotten time, but showing the world your ‘cheesy grin’.
Why at all notable occasions must there be a ‘photo opportunity’? Has mankind become so lazy that we can not use our brains to remember the good times we have had? And what about the times you’d really rather forget? Someone, unknown to you, has taken a picture at the very second you throw up on a table in a bar (Dave Webb).
My problem with photography is that I look terrible in 9/10 pictures taken of me. You may think it is cliché, but I genuinely do have ‘a good side’, where you cant see the spots on my neck, the way my hair curls at the fringe, and you cant see the confusing spongy shape of my nose (this being said, some women still find me moderately attractive so I’m not exactly Adrian Chiles). The point of how bad I look in pictures was for all to see on my graduation day. I made the mistake of not blocking the right side of my face at all times, that teamed with my poor fake smile means that I wont be setting my eyes on these pictures for some time now.
But here is your chance to.
Not good at all.
I have to be honest with you in saying that I actually enjoy a lot of photography (all that doesn’t include me), whether wildlife, sunsets, pornographic images, porn or porn. I also think that anybody who possesses a talent in photography has done very well for themselves (as they have at least one more talent than me).
But quite simply, don’t point your camera at me, don’t complain if I duck, move or obstruct the line of fire with something, and don’t be offended by the inevitability of me telling you to ‘go away’ (or maybe in a more abrupt and rude manor, possibly accompanied with a simple gesture and a smile).
Next instalment on trains to follow (by which I do not mean walking/running behind a train).
Sweet dreams.
Well put fella, well put indeed.
ReplyDeleteWhen you said you look bad in 9/10 pictures, I intially read it as you look bad in 9/11 pictures. I thought to myself (and then annouced loudly to the entire library) who doesn't look bad in 9/11 photos? Its just rubble and flames.
ReplyDeleteThat said I did enjoy it. Your blog, not 9/11.